


The Potions Master's Valentine

by HPFandom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, M/M, Parody, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-02-14
Updated: 2006-02-14
Packaged: 2018-10-01 12:41:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10190108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPFandom_archivist/pseuds/HPFandom_archivist
Summary: Even a potions master can join in the Valentine's Day celebrations.  My response to The Hex Files Valentine's Day challenge.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

This is my response to The Hex Files Valentines Day challenge to write a fic that is 750 words in length and begins with the words “Hearts and flowers.” Of course, I had to add my own little twist to this little challenge.

Disclaimer: J. K. Rowling owns these lovely characters and settings. I am only playing.

Unbeta’d

Hearts and Flowers

“Hearts and flowers,” Snape sneered. “Now I am well aware that on this very special day,” he spat out in obvious distaste, “that is nearly all your plebian, adolescent minds are capable of comprehending.” Drawing himself up to his full height, the potions master smirked at the now fidgeting youths that made up his seventh year potions class. “However,” he silkily continued, “in here, you will find that those words have a very different meaning.” Confused eyes followed their professor as he turned and flicked his wand at the blackboard. 

“As even the simplest mind in here can grasp,” he said as his eyes washed over the green-eyed Gryffindor and bane of his existence, “the heart of the fire salamander and the flower of the passion vine are the essential ingredients in today’s potion. Please note that both are extremely volatile and extremely expensive ingredients, so work with them carefully. Now get to work!”

Years of obeying that commanding voice served his students well as they immediately scrambled to gather the necessary ingredients. Harry patiently waited his turn at the supply cabinet and smiled slightly as he listened to Hermione as she tried to figure out what the potion could possibly be. Love potions were strictly forbidden, so it couldn’t be that, but what then?

The room was quiet as the seventh year N.E.W.T. class set to work on the mystery potion. Harry studiously ignored his friend and her continued consternation at being unable to identify today’s potion. Instead he focused on preparing his ingredients and following the written directions to pay her any more attention. Having finally decided to apply himself to his studies, Harry had been somewhat surprised to find that he actually began to understand and enjoy potions. Of course, that had remained his little secret. Some things were never meant to be shared with his Gryffindor friends.

 

Snape continued to stalk through the aisles, watching for potential problems and Gryffindor idiots and taking points for such. Finally, to the relief of all but his Slytherins, the surly potions master barked out the order to place a sample of the completed, or not, potion on his desk and for the students to clean up their messes.

Harry dutifully did as instructed and carefully ladled the contents of his finished potion into the vial before capping and marking the container. The young man who, yes, had indeed fulfilled his destiny and had in fact defeated ‘He-Who-Was-Not-Welcomed-at-Any-Party’ over this past Christmas holiday, turned in his sample and went back to clean up and gather his belongings. 

Severus Snape, noted and prominent antagonist of all things Gryffindor, smirked evilly before smoothly announcing, “Mr. Potter, you will remain.” Seeing the immediate and predictable objections from that damnable house, the potions master held up a hand. “The rest of you will leave – immediately!” Watching the unnerved students scurry to obey his command, the now, thankfully, former spy allowed a small amount of pleasure to flow through his veins. Merlin, but how he loved to frighten these children.

 

Harry shook his head at Hermione as she attempted to object to this rather blatant display of dis-favoritism. After many long and arduous hours of working one-on-one with the acerbic and irascible man, Harry had enough experience to know that no good could possibly come of arguing with the man. He would just have to be the brave Savior-of-the-World and face the big, bad potions master.

Finally, or all too quickly – depending upon how you looked at it – the class cleared out, leaving Harry to the mercy of the dour professor. Gulping, Harry decided to meet danger head on. “Sir, was there something that you wanted of me?” he asked quietly.

Smirking at his still-student, Severus Snape smoothly whipped out his wand and wove an intricate webbing of spells, effectively isolating the two men inside the classroom. 

Harry gulped. This could not be good. “Sir?” he inquired tentatively.

“Mr. Potter, can you tell me what the potion you and your classmates were attempting to make today?” The potions master took a step forward and by his very presence forced the young Gryffindor to back up against the wall.

“Um, a sex lubrication potion?” Harry ventured.

Drawing a long, slender finger down the younger man’s cheek, Severus smiled. “Very good, Mr. Potter. Twenty points to Gryffindor for your astute and intelligent observation. Now, why don’t we test the purity of these samples?” the potions master purred as he proceeded to ravish his love.

 

~The End~


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